Neurodivergent = Neuro-Awesome

Apr 15
6 min read

Updated: Apr 17

April is Autism Awareness Month, and this, Dear Reader, is something near and dear to my heart, home and life.

So, let's dive a little deeper into this subject and learn what Autism is and how to support people and families that deal with it on a daily basis.

What is Autism?

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a lifelong neurodevelopmental condition that affects social communication, behavior, and sensory processing.

As the name suggests, Autism is viewed as a spectrum instead of a "more or less" linear line like it was in the past. Each person has a unique combination of characteristics, strengths and weaknesses leading them to experience the world around them in different ways.

What are the Symptoms?

There are many signs that can indicate that an individual may have Autism. Please keep in mind that every person has a different combination and degree of symptoms and experience them differently as well. Some have several symptoms while others only experience only a few.

Some common signs can include:

Delayed speech or difficulty communicating
Hand Leading
Walking on toes
Parallel play
Little or no imaginative play
No joint attention-not looking in the same direction as others
Showing limited interest in others and or persistent preference for solitude
Highly emotional responses to changes in routine
Focused and dedicated interests
Repeated movements and behavior
Preference for order, predictability or routine
Avoidance of eye contact
Difficulty understanding other people's feelings
Difficulty understanding social cues
Unusual and intense reaction to sounds, smells, tastes, textures, lights and/or colors.

"I am different, not less." -- Temple Grandin

My kiddo was diagnosed when he was two and a half years old. I noticed some behaviors and tendencies that were—well—different from his little friends, such as having sensory issues with clothes and sound, walking on his toes, doing a lot of hand‑leading, and lining all his toys up.

The hardest thing he was going through at the time was that he was nonverbal. It was so hard for him and for me. I can't tell you the number of times that we would both wound-up crying, wrapped together on the kitchen floor because the frustration was so completely overwhelming for both of us.

I could see his little brain working and how hard he was trying to communicate. My sweet, little, smart, loving boy was stuck in his own head, and it broke my heart.

Everyone kept telling me that all kids are different and that they mature at different rates, that he would ‘catch up’ in his own time. But I knew in my heart that he and I needed more help.

“A mother understands what a child does not say.” —Jewish proverb

Diagnosis

Gaining a diagnosis for ASD can unfortunately be a bit complicated and lengthy. There are screenings and appointments that never seem to end. At least that's how it felt for me!

The diagnostic process step-by-step typically involves:

1) Initial screening and referral

2) Comprehensive developmental history

3) Behavioral observances

4) Standardized diagnostic assessments

5) Medical evaluations to rule out other conditions

6) Team discussion and diagnosis formulation

7) Feedback session with the individual and/or family

When you are looking for someone to officially diagnose your child (or even an adult) the list usually incudes Developmental Pediatricians, Child Psychiatrists, Clinical Psychologists, Pediatric Neurologists specializing in Autism and neurodevelopmental disorders.

I can't put enough emphasis on having a team approach to getting a diagnosis because each professional brings different skill sets and ways/ideas of treating ASD to the process.

"My autism isn't what makes me stand out, it's what makes me unique." ---Rachel Barcellona

Support

After you get the diagnosis people can experience a wide range of emotions. Some people feel relief because they finally have a diagnosis and a way to move forward. Maybe the things you imagined doing with your child are no longer an option and you may mourn the loss of what you thought your child's life was going to look like. You may even feel anger and denial.

I can honestly say my husband and I went through all the emotions at different speeds and at different times. The only thing we could agree on in the beginning is that we loved our little boy and we wanted to do what was best for him.

I knew we needed help, so we started looking into different support options. Thankfully, once we started doing research, we found out that there are a multitude of intervention and support options available including financial aid if that is something you may need. Here is a short list of different therapies that are available for ASD (taken from the Autism Speaks website).

As you can see, depending on your specific needs there is therapeutic support out there for you and your loved one. In addition to therapeutic support there are almost an endless supply of community support groups that you can find as well. Each state offers local organizations and support groups. Here in Texas, there are organizations like the Autism Society of Texas and Texas Parent to Parent that offer local chapters and online platforms.

There are Facebook groups and local social groups that are easy to get involved with and access. Other online communities like Autism Speaks and Care connection can point you in the right direction within your community offering lists of autism-friendly community groups and services.

If you are in need of additional advocacy there are different groups like The Arc of Texas and the Autism Society of Texas that work to advocate for services and better policies for people with Autism.

How Can I Help?

You may or may not know someone with Autism and you may be wondering how you can help or how you can advocate for that person or family.

My first and most important suggestion is to educate yourself and your kiddos about ASD.

Do give individuals the opportunity to be included in various activities. Autism almost always affects social interactions, so while they may need more guidance while doing activities, they will love being asked if they want to be included.
Do include people with Autism in conversations no matter how limited or delayed their speech is. Do not assume that they don't understand you.
Do invite them to neighborhood parties, birthday parties, gatherings and events. Autism is unpredictable from day to day so if they don't come or leave early don't think it's because they don't want to be involved. It may just be an off day.
Do be sensitive to loud noises or chaotic environments. Many times, people with ASD are sensitive to noise so if things are getting a bit much for your friends, let them know where there is a quiet place they can get some quiet time and reset their nervus system.
Don't think you have to be an Autism expert to be friends with or involve people with ASD in activities. An open and honest conversation with an Autism parent can sometimes be the best idea.
Do make sure to discuss Autism with your kiddos. General ASD education is great but if your kiddo has a friend with Autism, it may be helpful to have conversation on how they can be helpful and good friends to that specific child.
Do teach your kids that when someone with ASD is exhibiting unfamiliar behaviors that it's not ok to stare or make fun of them. Learn about common behaviors of Autism with your child to help them (and yourself) understand when it's appropriate to give space and when it's better to offer help.

"Children with autism are colorful-they are often very beautiful, and, like the rainbow, they stand out." ---Adele Devine

When my family started this journey, it was more than scarry. We didn't know what the future would hold and it seemed like the future that we envisioned was gone. We didn't know if our kiddo would ever speak more than a couple words, if he would play with other kids, if he would be able to ever tell us what he was thinking or feeling or wanted to do.

We started ABA therapy right away when he was three as well as speech therapy and we are so glad we started with early intervention.

While he didn’t start speaking more than a few words until he was four, he now (at almost five) has an extensive vocabulary, is thriving in homeschool, participates in gymnastics twice a week, plays baseball, and makes friendship and plays with kids he meets at the playground.

Every little milestone is a win. Every challenge we overcome is a celebration. He has taught me to look at the world differently. He loves without reservation. He is full of joy and life — a spark of light that floods every room he enters.

My mom says he is a bit of magic on earth. I think he is God’s reminder of what unfettered joy and love are supposed to be.

All I know is that I’m blessed to be his mom. While I am his advocate, support, voice, and safe space — he is my world.